Alarming Escalation!

If you haven't seen my old blog about the bovine conspiracy, you may do so here. Thousands of us all around the world who have tumbled the cows spend hundreds of thousands of hours between us, each week, monitoring media sources so we can warn the world of an all-out attack before it is too late.

We in the bovine conspiracy community, known as Cow Watchers, are becoming more and more concerned at the increasing incidents of cow violence toward humans. And we were alarmed, to say the least, that they have stepped up their campaign with an attack on former British cabinet minister, David Blunkett, on his 62nd birthday. For those who do not know, the most sickening aspect of the attack is that Mr Blunkett is blind. The cows went for his guide dog! The dog's fine — his training kicked in — but I think you will agree that this marks a terrifying escalation in hostilities, for he is still a member of Her Majesty's goverment and what happened at the weekend is tantamount to a declaration of war. Mr Blunkett has a broken rib but it could have been much worse. In an effort to protect his dog he was trampled. Mr Blunkett reports that if the cow had fallen on him he would have surely been killed.

I don't want to spread panic among the general population, but we could be only weeks away from enslavement.